Chinese Dating
Chinese dating is just as confusing, and wonderful, as any other type of dating. For Westerners, a willingness to learn about Chinese culture can make an interracial or international relationship stronger. For Chinese people who want to meet others from the same ethnic background, Internet dating sites can help.
Traditional Culture
As with any culture, not everyone from China shares the same beliefs. Still, there are some attitudes about dating that are common among the Chinese. An important one is the involvement of family. In the United States, we’re used to the idea that we make our own choices about whom we date and whom we marry. But in traditional Chinese families, the parents may expect to have a say. Issues that often emerge include:
Beyond the Stereotypes
You’re bound to get into trouble if you assume that for all Chinese, dating is the same. You’ll meet people who were born in the United States and have never lived in China, but who still follow traditional Chinese culture. You’ll also find people who moved here as adults but are completely comfortable with American-style dating. And of course, you’ll find everything in between as well.
What that means is that there’s not really any such thing as “Chinese dating.” As with any dating situations, it’s about getting to know a unique person, their outlook on life, and their personal interests, hopes and dreams.
Where to look for chinese dating:
If you’re interested in meeting people of Chinese background, you have many options. People who live in ethnically diverse cities will have many chances to meet and talk with people who are Chinese or Chinese-American.
If you live in a community where there aren’t many Asian residents, the Internet can help. Increasingly, web sites offer chances for meeting interesting chinese partners. An interesting website to start of is www.ecpod.com – this is not a dating site but rather a site for you to make friends with Chinese from China. It’s probably better to start of as friends before you try to move into something more than that.
A note for men interested in chinese dating:
Many American men are especially attracted to Asian women. But many Chinese-American women share the same complaints about the men who are interested in dating them. They’re tired of being treated like “China dolls,” or the stereotype that they’re “exotic,” and of the fact that some men seem more interested in their looks than their minds. There is also a common notion that Chinese women are obedient or subservient. Many Chinese-American women are offended by this idea. That’s not to say that a man looking for an exotic but obedient helpmate can’t find love with a Chinese woman, just that it’s easy to offend if you let stereotypes guide your dating attempts.
About the Author
Susan Lee is the co-founder of social network site www.ECPod.com, connecting China and the world.
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